“Throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life… Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy.” — Ephesians 4:22–24 (NLT)
Every couple who desires a lasting, Christ-centered marriage will face moments when old habits try to creep back in — moments of pride, impatience, or defensiveness. But God gives us a better way: renewal.
Paul’s words to the Ephesians remind us that we are no longer defined by who we used to be. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, we can throw off the old self and put on the new. That’s not a one-time event; it’s a daily decision.
Marriage brings two imperfect people together — and sometimes those old natures bump into each other. But when we invite the Spirit to renew our thoughts and attitudes, He breathes new life into our relationship. We stop seeing each other through the lens of frustration and begin to see each other through God’s heart of grace.
Every marriage that thrives begins with renewed thinking.
When you choose to let the Spirit shape your thoughts, your reactions change.
Instead of clinging to the past, you focus on what God is doing now.
Instead of saying, “That’s just the way I am,” you begin to say, “Holy Spirit, help me become who You created me to be.”
This is the mindset shift that leads to restoration. It’s how couples move from old patterns of criticism, control, or withdrawal into new rhythms of humility, forgiveness, and peace.
Throwing off the “old self” in marriage looks like surrendering your right to have the last word and choosing instead to seek understanding. It looks like forgiving when you could hold a grudge. It looks like praying for your spouse instead of complaining about them.
These small shifts open the door for healing — and sometimes, they even lead couples to renew their wedding vows, not as a ceremony of perfection but as a declaration of transformation.
God specializes in new beginnings. No matter what season your marriage is in, He is able to make all things new — including your heart, your thoughts, and your love.
Prayer
Lord, thank You for the power of Your Spirit that renews our hearts and minds. Help us throw off our old ways and put on Your righteousness. Teach us to think and act like You so our marriage reflects Your holiness and love. Amen.
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Dr. Deborah
Founder, Heart to Heart Ministry
Strengthening Marriages. Restoring Hearts. Equipping Lives.