Before the Ring - Preparing For God's Design in Marriage
A Blueprint for Building Christ-Centered Love
What you'll learn:
Pillar One: Compatibility & Core Values
Building a Strong Foundation
Pillar Two: Red Flags & Past Wounds
Pursuing Healing and Freedom
Pillar Three: Faith & Spiritual Discernment
Seeking God’s Direction Together
Pillar Four: Communication, Boundaries & Conflict
Speaking Truth with Grace
Pillar Five: Unity, Shared Vision & Decision-Making
Building a Future Together
Pillar Six: Preparing for Covenant
Marriage as God Intended
Build the foundation before you say "I do."
Before the Ring is a Christ-centered premarital journey for couples who are seriously dating, engaged, or prayerfully considering marriage.
Through biblical wisdom, honest conversations, and practical tools, you'll build the foundation for a healthy, God-honoring covenant, and gain the clarity to take your next step with peace.
Meet Your Guide – Dr. Deborah Skomba
For many years, I've had the privilege of walking alongside individuals and couples as they prepare for marriage and build stronger, Christ-centered relationships.
One thing I've learned is that a beautiful wedding is worth celebrating, but a strong, lasting marriage is worth preparing for.
That's why I created
"Before the Ring - Preparing for God's Design in Marriage
A Blueprint for Christ-Centered Love"
My heart is to help you slow down, ask meaningful questions, recognize what matters most, and prepare for more than the day you say, "I do."
Through biblical wisdom, practical tools, thoughtful reflection, and honest conversations, you'll explore your values, personal relationship with Christ, spiritual alignment, communication, shared vision, and readiness for covenant.
Along the way, I'll share insights from my years of marriage ministry and counseling to help you recognize potential challenges, strengthen what is healthy, and prayerfully consider the future you're preparing to build.
You don't need to have all the answers before you begin. You simply need a willing heart to seek God's wisdom and discover what a Christ-centered marriage truly requires.
My prayer is that Before the Ring will give you greater clarity, confidence, and peace as you prepare for one of life's most sacred commitments.
Let's prepare for a lifetime together not just a wedding day.
Love is a beautiful start—
but it can’t carry a marriage all by itself. Before you get engaged or married, it’s wise to talk about the things that truly matter.
10 Questions Every Couple Should Ask Before the Ring is a free guide to help you start honest, heart-to-heart conversations about faith, values, dreams, and everyday life so you can build a lasting, Christ-centered marriage.
Download it now—your future together deserves a strong foundation.
What to Expect + How It Works
The Connect Conversation
We name what’s real and what needs attention before engagement—without pressure, fear, or rushing.
The Foundation Season
Through six Pillars, you'll build what holds a marriage together: shared values, faith, healthy communication, healing from the past, and a vision for your future, with support from me along the way.
The Covenant Decision
You'll discern together, with peace instead of pressure, whether you're ready to move forward into covenant, and prepare your hearts to make that promise.
The Unity Plan
We get on the same page about boundaries, family expectations, finances, and daily life, and put it into one shared plan.
The Confident Next Step
You'll leave with clarity, a faith-centered plan, and peace about your next step, whether that's moving toward engagement, walking down the aisle, or taking more time to grow.
FAQ
1) Who is this for?
Before the Ring is for Christian couples who are seriously dating, considering engagement, or already engaged, and for anyone who wants clarity before taking the next step.
2) Do we have to be Christians to work with you?
No. Before the Ring is faith-based and built on biblical truth, so you'll get the most from it if you're open to Christ-centered guidance. Couples who are exploring faith, or where only one partner is a believer, are welcome too.
3) What’s the difference between coaching and counseling?
Coaching is forward-focused and goal-centered. Together, we work on skills, clarity, and building a strong foundation for your future. As a pastoral counselor, I also offer biblically based counseling for couples who need help getting unstuck from their past. If something comes up that calls for clinical care, such as trauma, abuse, or mental health concerns, I'll encourage you to see a licensed professional, and our work together can continue alongside that support.
4) Will you tell us whether we should get married?
I won't decide for you. I'll help you ask the right questions, see patterns clearly, and take your next step with wisdom and peace. If I see serious concerns, I'll lovingly tell you the truth, because you deserve honesty before making a lifelong covenant.
5) What topics will we cover?
Before the Ring is built on six Pillars:
- Compatibility & Core Values: who you are and what matters most to each of you
- Red Flags & Past Wounds: recognizing unhealthy patterns and finding healing
- Faith & Spiritual Alignment: building your relationship on Christ together
- Communication, Boundaries & Conflict: speaking truth with grace and protecting your relationship
- Unity, Shared Vision & Decision-Making: finances, family, and planning your future as a team
- Preparing for Covenant: intimacy, readiness, and the promise you're preparing to make
6) How long does it take?
The self-paced course has six Pillars. At about one lesson a week, most couples finish in around six months, and you're welcome to move faster or slower. With Deeper Together(optional personal coaching), the length depends on your needs. Many couples choose a short series of coaching sessions to cover the essentials, while others continue longer for deeper work.
7) Do you meet with us together, individually, or both?
In Deeper Together (optional personalized sessions), are with both of you. When it would help, individual sessions can be added to support personal growth and clarity. All sessions are held online with Zoom, so you can join from anywhere.
8) Is this confidential?
Yes. Your privacy matters, and your story is handled with care and respect. The only exceptions are situations where someone's safety is at risk, such as a threat of harm to yourself or others, or suspected abuse of a child or vulnerable adult. In those cases, I'm required to take steps to protect those involved.
9) Do you offer virtual sessions?
Yes. Sessions are available online by Zoom, so you can stay consistent wherever you live, even if you're in a long-distance relationship. The self-paced course is also fully online, so you can work through it from anywhere.
10) What if we discover major concerns?
That's not failure; that's wisdom. We'll slow down, talk through what's coming up, and decide the healthiest next step with truth and grace. If you're in the self-paced course, you can add coaching or pastoral counseling at any point for support. And if a concern involves your safety, please reach out for help right away. Any questions you can extra support by calling: National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233)
Before the Ring Don’t Guess Your Way Into Engagement
Get clarity. Strengthen your foundation. Take your next step with wisdom and peace.
Start here: Download my free guide,
“10 Questions Every Couple Should Ask Before the Ring”
Then book your Connect Call to talk through your next best step.