By Dr Deborah Skomba

Have you ever looked across the room at your spouse and thought, “How did we get here?” You’re under the same roof, but it feels like you’re miles apart. The truth is—emotional disconnection in marriage doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a slow drift, a quiet ache, and a thousand missed moments.

But here’s the good news: God sees you, and He cares deeply about your marriage. There is hope for healing, and it starts at the heart.

Why Emotional Distance Happens

Many couples say, “We love each other, but we don’t feel close anymore.”
That’s not uncommon. Life gets busy. Work schedules, parenting demands, and stress pile up—and before you know it, you’re just managing life together, not living it connected.

You stop praying together. You stop dreaming together.
And somewhere along the way, you stop really talking.

What God Says About Connection

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (NLT) reminds us:
“Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help.”

But what happens when one person is falling, and the other doesn’t see it?

God created marriage as a partnership of the heart—a place of safety, support, and spiritual growth. When disconnection creeps in, God offers a way to reconnect, not just emotionally, but spiritually.

How to Begin Rebuilding Connection

  1. Start with One Honest Conversation
    Say something simple like, “Can we talk tonight? I miss us.”
    Don’t wait for the perfect time—just start.
  2. Pray Together Again
    Even if it’s short or feels unfamiliar, a prayer like “Lord, we need You” can begin the healing process.
  3. Use My Free Resource
    Download “10 Questions Every Couple Should Ask Before or After the Ring.”
    These questions open the door to real conversations.
  4. Schedule Weekly Heart Check-ins
    Set aside twenty minutes. No phones. No kids. Just time to listen, speak honestly, and reconnect.

You Are Not Alone

Emotional distance doesn’t have to define your marriage. God is in the business of restoring what’s been broken. The laughter can return. The warmth can come back. The connection can be rebuilt.

And it begins with one intentional step toward each other.

A Prayer for Your Marriage

Father God, we invite You into our marriage. Heal what has been broken. Soften our hearts. Help us find our way back to each other and to You. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Next Steps

  • Let’s talk—book your free 20-minute Heart-to-Heart Call with me today. Together, we’ll uncover what’s holding you back and take your first step toward healing. CLICK HERE TO SCHEDULE
  • 10 Questions Every Couple Should Ask Before the Ring. It’s not a checklist—it’s a tool for clarity, communication, and confirmation. It helps couples slow down and see not just the red flags—but the real, God-given strengths they already carry. CLICK HERE FOR GUIDE

Know a Couple Who Needs Clarity Before the Ring?

If you know someone who’s seriously dating or newly engaged, I’d be honored if you referred them to Before the Ring. When they complete the program, I’ll send you a $25 Amazon Gift Card as a thank-you—have them mention your name when they sign up.

 

You were never meant to do this alone. Let’s build a marriage that reflects God’s love—together.

Grow in grace,
Deborah